We like to think that our thoughts and emotions are individual, personal, and entirely our own. But in reality, our deepest, darkest thoughts and emotions are shaped significantly by the society we live in. They can be heavily influenced by the culture we exist within, as well as our relationships with family, friends, colleagues and people in general.
It can be hard to take a step back and understand that our innermost thoughts and feelings are not actually our own. But that doesn’t make it any less true. From a neurological point of view, our brains are malleable, and in many ways, shaped by the world around us.
Of course, we can take control of our own thoughts and feelings and make decisions based on our own values and philosophies. However, it can be difficult to separate ourselves from the external influences in our lives, and our true selves can become hidden beneath the layers of the things we have been taught and expected to think and feel. When this happens, our thoughts and emotions themselves often become independent from who we really are.
Culture and Social Pressures
Cultural and social pressures play a huge role in our inner lives. We are constantly exposed to messages from society about what we should think and feel and how we should behave. In many cases, this shapes our thoughts and emotions without us even realising.
For example, if you live in a deeply religious society, you are likely to feel a strong pressure to adhere to religious beliefs and practices. This pressure can lead to feelings of guilt and shame when you do not follow them and can heavily influence the way you think and feel about religious matters. Similarly, if you live in a society with strong gender stereotypes, you may find yourself feeling uncomfortable or ashamed if you do not fit into these expectations.
Cultural beliefs and practices can also play a huge role in shaping our thoughts and emotions. For example, if you grow up in an environment where mental health issues are not taken seriously, you may find yourself feeling ashamed or embarrassed about your own mental health struggles.
Our Relationships
Relationships can also shape our inner lives in a major way. The way we interact with the people in our lives can shape our thoughts and emotions in both positive and negative ways.
Positive relationships can be hugely enriching and can bring out the best in us. When we feel supported and loved, are able to be vulnerable and open up, and engage in meaningful conversations, we can learn more about ourselves and our unique perspectives and grow in confidence.
On the flip side, negative relationships can have a huge impact on our thoughts and emotions. We often carry with us the judgments and criticism from those in our lives, and this can lead to feelings of guilt, shame, and insecurity. It can often shape our thoughts and decision making in negative ways.
The Struggle for Authenticity
Living within a complex web of external influences, it can be difficult to uncover our authentic self. It is easy to become comfortable in the roles society has asked us to play and in the expectations we have been conditioned to accept, making us forget our true values, beliefs, and ambitions. This can leave us feeling disconnected from our inner worlds and can create a struggle to be true to ourselves.
“You have to participate relentlessly in the manifestation of your own blessings.” ― Elizabeth Gilbert
It can be a challenge to unlearn the things we have been taught and to embrace the unique person we know ourselves to be. It is important to take the time to question the assumptions and expectations of our society and to trust our own intuition and inner guidance systems. It is only by doing this that we can become comfortable with ourselves and tap into our authentic selves.
Conclusion
At the end of the day, it is important to understand that our deepest thoughts and emotions are not actually our own. We are all shaped by the society in which we live and the relationships we have with those around us. This can make it difficult to understand our true selves, but in order to do this, we must learn to distance ourselves from the external influences around us and embrace our unique perspectives and values.
As Elizabeth Gilbert said, “You have to participate relentlessly in the manifestation of your own blessings.” It is only by doing this that we can tap into our authentic selves and create a life that is deeply rooted in truth and self-acceptance.
Sources:
Gilbert, Elizabeth. “You Have to Participate Relentlessly in the Manifestation of Your Own Blessings.” Goodreads, Goodreads, 2 Nov. 2009, www.goodreads.com/quotes/41856-you-have-to-participate-relentlessly-in-the-manifestation-of-your.